Finding it really difficult at the moment to try and get the N out of my head. Been together on and off for 4 yrs I didn’t know what his problem was until I started to research the silent treatment. Eventually that led me to narcissism, and bloody hell from what I have been reading on these posts, they are all the same. Broke up over 6 months ago now and although I have had quite a few curtain calls we have not met since, am doing the NC theory now but Wow is it hard? As I am sure everyone has found that out. Trying to change my thought patterns from totally besotted to ignore – it is so hard. I am trying to keep myself busy so that I don’t think about him, but there are always times in the day when my mind wanders and that’s not good. I am so much better off without him and hopefully in another 6 months time I will be free in mind of him Image may be NSFW.
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Any help or support from others would help.
x Thanks
Karen Liverpool England x
Dear Karen: It is very difficult. Do not feel bad when you think you should be farther along in your recovery. You were together with the N for 4 years. Just like when the “experts” talk about losing weight – “you didn’t put it on in 6 months – it will take longer than 6 months to take off.” Same with the N.
Read my post FAQ: Missing Pretend Guy. It might be of some help.
I’m sure you’ve read my advice to others.
Get some exercise
Take a walk
Talk an elderly neighbor’s dog for a walk if you are feeling like you need protection.
Read a book
Remember that hobby you used to enjoy? But gave up because the N didn’t want you to enjoy yourself?
Start it up again.
Keep track of your days of NC – It is comforting to see your accomplishments
ES
